Mother's Day

For the last 12 years Mother's Day has been a holiday that has brought me confused feelings of sadness, anger, bitterness, and indifference.  I usually choose to try and ignore it or just have a good cry with my sister.  At the same time I have learned to celebrate those amazing women whom God has put in my life to fill that role as the years have gone by, like certain friends, my aunts, my Grandma, Pam Downey, Ina-my first year teacher mentor, Jeff's mom, and his grandmas.

Speaking of Jeff's mom, I am so so blessed to have such a wonderful mother-in-law.  Thank you Kim for being an amazing mom to Jeff and to me.  Thank you for raising an amazing man to be my husband and father of our children.  Thank you for treating me like a daughter these last few years, for the great conversations, the shopping trips, the cooking and gardening advice, the Christmas and birthday presents, the teaching materials, and the wholehearted acceptance into your family.  I hope and pray that Jeff and I will be as good of parents as you and Ben are, and that our marriage will reflect the qualities of service, patience, and commitment that radiates from yours.  Thank you for that example.

Although I still feel that aching in the bottom of my heart today, I am excited for this holiday to take on more a more joyful spirit.  Today, my first Mother's Day, with my baby girl still warm and safe inside me, helps me reflect on the gift that has been given to me and the responsibility it entails.  This morning at church one of our pastors said that his mom had passed away years ago and he spent some time this morning thinking about all of the gifts she had given him.  So during the service I quietly reflected and jotted down some fond memories that I have from my childhood, things that I am thankful for.  In an effort to keep working towards the forgiveness that I mentioned during the lenten season, I feel I should give voice to all the ways my mom was a good mom to us when we were young.  Lord I thank you for a mom who stayed home to raise us, who read to us, who cooked good meals, took us to the zoo, to the Botanical Gardens, Science Center, and art museum, who introduced me to my love of musicals, who thought it important to pay for Catholic grade school, took me to church, made my Halloween costumes, dresses, and costumes for school plays, who let us play sports and cheered us on at our games, who took us on camping trips and float trips, who cared enough to be strict with what we watched on TV and movies and what music we listened to, who let me have a backyard tent sleepover birthday party, who took us to the pool, the park, and for all the other wonderful gifts and experiences.